IN ONE of my subjects this semester, Psychology 1, we were given a life script. Yes a life script.. I thought it would be fun. I thought it would be easy.
Then I stare at the paper that was passed to me by an unknown seatmate. In the upper left corner —Life Script. Life script it is. It was filled with questions. Can’t remember how many but maybe there’s around 25 questions. As I scan the questions, one word catches my attention. My eyes were glued to that certain word. Then I started all over again. This time I didn’t just scan it. I read the questions. The first one was;
1. How do you see yourself?
And at that moment, I was stucked. I was stucked at the very first question. Before long I continue reading the following questions;
2. Three things I wanted to change to myself
And I was stunned again. What do I want to change?? After a brief moment;
3. How do you see your MOTHER?
4. How are you like your MOTHER?
5. How are you unlike your MOTHER?
6. Her main advice to me is
The first time I read that word I was like —what? The second time I was like —what the?! The third time I was like –are you kidding me?! The following question I was like —okaaaay (with my eyes getting wider and wider for every questions). Every time I read such word, it was like shouting to me, screaming through my ears..
7. How do you see your father?
8. How are you like your father?
9. How are you unlike your father?
10. His main advice to me is
I was calm but then panicking at the same time. Panicking, for I don’t know what will I write. I don’t know how will I answer those.
11. Some of the main do’s that were programmed to me are
12. Some of the main don’t’s that were programmed to me are
What main do’s? main don’t’s? I was really mixed up..
13. How do you see yourself as a child?
14. How do you see yourself as an adolescent?
15. How do you see yourself five years ago?
16. How do you see yourself five years from now?
Here it is again.. how do I see myself? as a child? as an adolescent? five years ago? five years from now? I am totally lost. I don’t really know how I see myself in the first place.
17. One important decision I made as a child was
18. One early decision that I felt I have change is
Decisions? I’ve got lots of it. Important.. I think all decisions are important. Tsk.. I don’t know if how I’m taking these..
19. If you would write your epitaph, what would your epitaph be?
Lived life. Befriended Fear. Welcomed death..
20. What do you want most out of life?
Oh there’s only one thing but two ways I want most out of life –the very popular yet complicated, love –to love and to be loved..
21. Three wishes you wanted to really happen
I’ve got wishes and I wanted it all to happen. But the most important? Well I’d rather kept it to myself..
22. I like myself when
23. I least like myself when
Here it goes again.. I don’t know when I like or when I don’t like myself -.- or maybe I’m just denying it. Oh I just said it. K.
24. My hobby(ies)/My talent(s) are
I know my hobbies but I didn’t know any talent of mine. -.-
I think the Life Script has 25 questions and I’m missing one more. And I can’t remember what it is or what it’s all about. -.- The questions written by me aren’t the exact words used in the questions in the Life Script but it was close enough, I can tell.
For every questions thrown to me by that paper, it was thrown like hell! I was speechless. I didn’t have any idea how I would answers such questions. I answered it for a very long time and there comes a point where I gave up anymore because I can’t think of any answers anymore. I’m drained. So what did I do? Simple as this, I simply leave some questions unanswered!
Not all the questions can be answered right away. Sometimes it takes time to accept the fact and be ready to answer the questions thrown to you. It takes seconds to answer but it takes a lifetime to know yourself. And this is when I’ve said; I really don’t know my life, myself, and there are things that were really hard to understand.
(picture from Google images)