Bestfriend Is More Than Just a Label

I’VE GOT no bestfriend. I never call anyone as my bestfriend rather. Yes I do have friends. Lots of them. But the thing is, from them, who are the true ones? But the thing is, from them, how will I know who are the true ones? I just want to leave it unanswered.

Bestfriend. One of my friends asked me; can you be my bestfriend? And my answer? I think it’s not a thing to ask for. It’s in the people. If they think you are a best friend to them then so be it. Do you think I’m rude for answering like that? I mean, yes, that friend of mine is one of my close friends. And I’m really overwhelmed she have asked that. I wanted to be her bestfriend but the thing is I’m afraid that our friendship will just become a label. I’m afraid that if I just answered her, okay then we’re bestfriends, our friendship will just be based from that label; a label without caring, a label without understanding, a label just so there’s a label, just a label and nothing more. And I never wanted it to happen.

Bestfriend. One of my friends asked me; who’s that? Your bestfriend? And my answer? Ah I don’t know, a close friend, yes, a close friend. Again, I never ever called anyone, even those who are close to me, as my bestfriend. So I have chosen to call them simply as friend or a close friend.

Bestfriend. I don’t have one. Or maybe I’m afraid to call one as my bestfriend. But deep inside me, I know who my bestfriends are. There are just things that scared me. Things that I don’t want to happen. Things that I don’t want to feel. Things that will flip my world upside down. Things that will swallow me. Things that will hurt me. Things that will… Maybe I fear that what if I call someone as my bestfriend and it’s not vice versa? Maybe I fear that what if I call someone as my bestfriend and it’ll just remain as a label? Maybe I fear that what if I call someone as my bestfriend and it’s not true at all?

Bestfriend;

I’d rather have a friendship built by understanding
than a friendship built by just a label.

I’d rather have a friendship with trust
than a friendship with label.

I’d rather have a friendship because of caring
than a friendship because of labeling.

I’d rather have a friendship bonded by one another
than a friendship bonded by a label.

I’d rather have a friendship strengthen thru time
than a friendship strengthen thru label.

I’d rather have a friendship that’s true and everlasting
than a friendship that’s unsure.

Let’s just not forget that friendship is not a label. Friendship is not about giving someone a label. Friendship is not about calling someone with a label.. Maybe one day, I can finally call, out loud, who my bestfriend(s) is(are) with all my heart.

^~~~^

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With Fear I Face Life, While You Befriended Fear and Face Death…

I TOOK your hand and hold it tight
I don’t want you out of my sight
When in darkness you gave me light
And it is coz of love, you fight.

In times of these I need to be strong
And you’ll be staying there for how long?
Waiting for you my tears were prolonged
But it’s by your side where I belong.

I close my eyes and saw you smile
Can we just stay here for a while?
I tried to reach you in a mile
But you just stand there with your smile.

I open my eyes, with fear I face life
While you befriended fear and face death
Reality stabs me with a sharp knife
Can’t we just go back to the time we met?

Farewell to the sight of you my dear
But neither to your voice I still hear
Nor to your love that’ll always be here
Thanks, with your love there’s nothing I fear.

^~~~^

Living With These Clothes

IT’S OUR clothes.. Others may adore how brave we are. Some see us as a person who is fear-free, a person who walks with pride.

But bravery isn’t really it.

Sometimes we just didn’t want them to know how scared we are. We just didn’t want them to show our weaknesses. Because if we let them show such things, we don’t know how will they react, we don’t know what will happen.

And that’s the reason we are so afraid; we don’t want to know.. We don’t want to know because it will change something. And we’re afraid of changes. Afraid of changes because we’re not used to it. Because we don’t want to learn or to do new things. Because we don’t want to adjust. Because we don’t understand. Because it’s set in our minds that it will change the something into nothing.

And we all hate what we don’t understand.. So our tendency is to choose to wear our clothes on thinking things will be better that way.

“We fear what we do not understand.”

^~~~^