The Moment The Night Fall

THE BODY falls hard
a throbbing pain in the back
but in a moment
comfortable encompasses
when night fall,

The eyes beg for a close
filled with too much reality
but in a moment
escaped tears trickle
when night fall,

The time without care just goes on
as fast as the faster among the fastest
but in a moment
it fools us as if slowing itself
when night fall,

The silence usher in
filling in the darkness
but in a moment
the silence was deafening
when night fall,

The mind is set to rest
to forget the problem
but in a moment
problems are all that set in
when night fall,

The heart slows down its rhythm
knowing it needed to
but in a moment
the pain came interfering
when night fall.

Just resting is not as simple as lying down
but as complicated as the veracity,
for it is when;
remorse appears, feelings burst out,
flashbacks play, pains strike,
problems come vivid,
like everything stabs the soul.

But in a moment
for just another moment
all of it seems not to matter anymore;
for the body feels pain no more,
for the eyes see the nothingness,
for the time got weary of running,
for the silence seems to hear itself,
for the mind thinks of nonentity,
for the heart reaches —-its last and final beat,
the moment the night fall.

^~~~^

Senseless or Non sense?

Feel Like Writing

I FEEL like writing. I want to write about.. about something I know not. What I know is just I want to write, type, and write. It came to the point that I get annoyed because I can’t think of what will I write is all about. I want to write, to type. Closing my eyes I think of the things that gives me inspiration… but my mind get mixed up.

Ting! There is some thing that pops out my mind but the next thing I’m thinking is just another matter that is not about the thing that had just pop out my mind.

Ting! There’s another, I think of a ‘much’ better thing then my mind continues to search for another thing. I can’t focus on what I will write.

And right now, I think you are already mixed up for my matter right now is not clear and for what you are reading right now is just a long senseless never-ending thinking things.. And right now, I think you are already mixed up for what my matter right now is not clear and for what you are reading is just another senseless sentence that I had just type again.. And right now, I think you are already mixed up for what my matter right now is not really clear and for what you are reading is just another non sense sentence I just repeated for the third time.. And right now, I think you are not mixed up but you are really annoyed with me or with this thing for what my matter right now is now clear and for what my matter right now is to make you and your mind perplex  and for what you are reading right now is just to make you vex.. And right now, I think you are, okay I’ll stop it.

I know you are already wrath. Sorry for that. And right now, I think you are, okay I will stop this non sense thing for you are right now is already annoyed, okay I just repeated it again. Stop. Stop. Stop. Again, I’m saying sorry.. but not really saying, I had type it right? Typing.. typing.. typing.. typing sorry again. Okay sorry. Really I am sorry. Sorry I am sorry.

I just want to write, I just want to.. I just want to.. I just want your mind to be mixed up even if it is, I think, really mixed up. Is it? Is your mind really mixed up? Already mixed up? Confused? Confused? Are you? Don’t you? Aren’t you? Do you?

See this ‘feel-like-writing’ thing is a non sense, just another senseless thing. If it is not, then what’s the sense of writing this? I just want to write, write, type, type, write, type, write, and yeah type but it turns out to be a mind game (oh really?). Mixing up your mind, confusing your mind, annoying yourself.. wait, it’s mixing up your brain, confusing your brain, annoying yourself. It’s just it. I owe you an apologize. Sorry again for that one… two.. three.. no, sorry for that one. Okay don’t mind me, I’m just apologizing.

You decide, is it senseless or non sense?? Senseless or non sense? I think it is neither non sense nor senseless for it has a sense, it is ‘no’ sense. Okay, you have my word. You decide.. Senseless or non sense? or Non sense or senseless? I’m just making you confused again.. I’ll stop it.. Now you have read it. It is not senseless or non sense, it has a sense anymore, right? left? right? Yeah, it’s right eh. Is it?

^~~~^

What ‘IF’

“Things would never be the same”

WALKING IN a place with many ‘different’ people made me write this. Almost everyday walking from dorm to classes and from classes to classes I’ve heard a lot of people’s conversation. I’m not eavesdropping from what they are talking about, I was just overhearing it because of the way they talk. I’ve heard different things, different topics but what catches my ears are the what-ifs..

Vast of people, especially teenagers, talk about the very popular what-if thing. What if I didn’t do it, what if I’ve done it, what if it didn’t happen, what if it had happened, what if I agreed, what if I said no, what if… things would never be the same. Aren’t they got tired of their own what-if thing? Aren’t their ears got tired of that certain deafening matter? Let me tell this, why focus on what had not happen if the only thing it do to us is regret. If it only makes us think of what should have happen if things didn’t happen that way. Squandering the time on thinking “it-should-have-been” and making another outcome that never will happen is just a senseless waste of time, right? Just a waste of time.

Listen to your own voice, aren’t you got tired of your own what-ifs? Let us fix our mind on what-will and what-can we do. We can’t get the time back, no one can, anyhow we want it. It’s neither fair nor unfair, but that how life is. Let not waste our current time focusing on what had lapsed. Things will happen because it is what suppose to happen, things will happen the way it should be, things will happen for a reason, things will happen because that what life is about. Now, who says “things would never be the same”? Maybe yes, things would never be the same but it may be also just the same. Who knows? No one did, no one has any assurance of all goings-on, no one can tell. Stop the what-ifs because things can never be the same or things will happen just the same. I know not, you know not, we never will know, no one will ever know. So stop thinking about it, stop wasting your time, stop regretting things that didn’t even happen.

^~~~^

When We Go With The Flow

Things Get Complicated

“YES”, “OKAY”, “no problem”, “of course”, nowadays these are the common answers of people if someone begs for a favor. Others became afraid of saying ‘no’ because when they say ‘no’ it’s like they’re out of this world, they’re out in the circle of friends. And it came to the point that people forgot to utter ‘no’. Then we are obliged to do what we do not want to do, we do the favor of others with our sad faces and with a heavy feelings, and we are, occasionally, do even the bad things. We kept walking on the wrong road even if we already knew we are on the wrong way which violated our own self, our own decision, our own life.

People often say “action speaks louder than word” and most of us believe those, most of us take that into action. I’m not saying it’s not right because it is true.. but not all the time. Our mistake is that we go with the flow; we are like ‘forced’ to believe something because that’s what many believe in to.

Sometimes people misunderstood your actions. For some it didn’t appear how you want it to and that’s when things get complicated. When things get complicated, explanations and reasons are needed but then those were just heard by the ears and not mind and heart. It means when you started to have explanations or reasons that’s when others have hard time accepting those because people, as well as the ears, got tired of listening. In order to avoid getting things complicated, at times, it’s better to talk first, talk. Let us learn to ‘not to do’ what many have done because the thing is; happenings have a different outcome. Maybe for others “action speaks louder than word” but not for all of us; we have different dilemmas, different problems, different life and we are different people, different from one another.

When we go with the flow, sometimes, things get complicated.

^~~~^